I am so glad it is all done with! Yeah, I am shouting for joy. The doctor was able to complete the entire palate surgery with this one. We are thrilled. If it heals up completely he will be done with the palate until he is about 8-10, for the bone grafting surgery. But because of the success of the surgery, the surgeon did NOT allow us to give him a bottle following surgery like he first said, as he really didn't want to have do it again, for Asher's sake. I was not happy and neither was Asher. But we did figure out the Tender Care Feeders were a good enough substitute. But it has been a challenge, as he really misses that feeding and bonding time with Mama.
It wasn't a complicated surgery, but the night's stay in the hospital was a difficult experience for him. He cried for hours through out the night, in my arms in the hospital bed. I am not sure it was because he was in pain, as we really tried to keep up on that well. I think it had more to do with the fact that he was put in Peds ICU, which meant we had a regular room but had a nurse sitting on the side of our bed the entire time he was there. He just did NOT trust those people and he did NOT want to be there. He cried every time they touched him, even for temp reads and blood pressures.
They were really kind and compassionate toward him. I made a care plan out and had it in his chart. They made sure each nurse read it and followed it. I focused mostly on his medical trauma instead of adoption and attachment. As unfortunately, I have been finding that most medical professionals are clueless about attachment and always have an opinion to give about what we are doing to facilitate that (ie still giving him the bottle, co-sleeping, no other care givers etc.). So I focused on what I new they would get and they were much more willing to comply with gentle and understanding care as long as he was not having complications. Thank the Lord, he did not.
So we came home the following afternoon and he was so happy to see and play with everyone. I took him of the pain meds the next day, after he threw up from them and still wasn't eating well. I put him strictly on tylenol and it seemed to control the pain okay. Plus, he finally wanted to eat. It still took another few days for him to eat a lot, but a small couple bites of applesauce was better than nothing.
We saw the surgeon last Thursday and he said it all is healing up wonderfully. He is encouraging us to do the lip and nose revision this fall/winter. I am really going to pray about it. While I do trust our surgeon, I am just not ready for another surgery today. I want to do what the Lord wants though, and He knows what is best.
The biggest reason I am not ready, is that this surgery seemed to bring up trauma issues for Asher during sleep time again. This was something we dealt with the first few months he was home and we were finally there at I believe a healing place. He is already doing better today than he was a week ago. However, I am not sure if that would be good or not for him to do another surgery so soon. The good news is that the doctor did say we can still give him the bottle after that surgery, although Asher may not feel like taking it for a few days.
So we will be praying and asking God for HIS best in this decision.
Daddy holding Asher for the 30 minutes after they gave him Versed to help be relaxed and not have memory prior and during to walking back to surgery. He was fine up until the last 5 minutes, then he started to cry, since he did not like the weird feeling and that he couldn't hold his head up. Poor Guy. When the nurse came to get him, he willingly went with her in his arms. They never did make us put hospital PJs on him, thanks to my Care Plan. We just took of his shirt and he kept his diaper and PJ shorts on. It really helped the transition go smoother for him.
After about 2 hours he did make some communication to us (Jay was finally back with me as well). He signed, with his eyes closed, "more" and "help". I told the nurse that and she wrote it down as communicating, since that was one of the things they needed to move him to Pediatrics. However, he did still continue to sleep, he was just very comfortable. I finally convinced the nurse that after all that time I thought it would be more stressful for him if we waited for him to wake up and then promptly move him to another room. She agreed and got permission to move him before he woke since his vitals had been so great and it had been so long, after all. Wouldn't you know it, he woke when she wheeled him to the elevator and Jay and I weren't with him? It was only for a few minutes, but I so wanted us to be the first that he saw. Maybe that is why he woke? Because after we had been standing by his side, he then sensed we weren't there with him anymore?
This was the hour before he got to come home. Daddy came back to relieve me so I could actually use the bathroom and get changed and brush my teeth. The nurse got discharge papers ready and we left shortly after. But Asher really enjoyed this wagon. I have no pictures of the time between recovery and this, as all I did was hold that little boy and listen to him moan and cry a lot in my arms from about 5 PM until the next morning. He did perk up a lot when Daddy came about 10 AM. He was a trooper and I came home and had a huge stress let down. I was tired, but so thankful it was done and a success. Thank you to our wonderful doctors and nurses.
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