When We Give To The Least of These

I LOVE this song by Audio Adrenaline. 

Is it possible to  be a Christian, a Christ follower, a Believer, a friend and disciple to Jesus, one who should have a heart after our Abba Father and still walk away from the needs of these innocent, precious children? Can we claim we don't have any money, time or ability to help them when we have Christ living in us, who gave us E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!!!!! 

I mean every little crumb of food we eat, every little breath we take, every single night we get to sleep in a warm, safe, comfortable bed and every day we live (oh what a gift they are). And then to top it all off, He sent HIS one, only, perfect, Son, the King of all Kings to DIE for us, for me and raise from the dead so we can conquer death, sin and live for eternity with our merciful, gracious, loving Father.

I have been reading that most churches in America don't even have an orphan or adoption ministry. However, they find many ways to make their church more comfortable and fancy with coffee shops and more. (I am not saying I am against comfortable and coffee shops either, just making an analogy.)

There are millions and millions of children around the world and here in the US who need a family. If every Christian family would help just one child there would be no more orphans. I can't fathom that, but I know we have a Father God who does want to see that happen and He will make a way. There are families being awakened to that need, but they don't have a lot of support. Adoption is a long, tiring, expensive, emotional, frustrating and lonely journey. And because it IS God's heart the attacks from the enemy are strong. But the church's love, prayer, support and encouragement will help all of that to be none or in the least strong against the attacks.

Come alongside your adopting friends. Pray for them faithfully, encourage them, love their children even the ones not adopted, babysit for them, take them a meal before and after the adoption, just be a listening ear and show them Jesus' love for the "least" of these.

If you truly have examined your lives and hearts and believe you just have nothing else to give of your God-given resources then pray some more for Him to show you how. What can you give to the "least" of these? Will you minister to the families choosing to adopt? Will you go to the mission field and serve them face to face? Will you adopt yourself?

Don't be known as the "Lukewarm" church like in Revelation 3:14-22: ¹⁵ “I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. ¹⁶ So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth."

Here is a side note. I got a precious few photos today from a mom who just adopted her 2 year old from the same orphanage as Elliana is at. Here are a couple of her cuteness. 

Oh, these last few months are getting harder and harder. She looks like she needs to smile and be loved. How did "I" become the one that God chose to love these beautiful children? Thank you Lord of Heaven for your amazing, love for me to allow me this opportunity to love the "least" of these. 
  
Please pray our Letter of Acceptance (LOA) will come by the end of next week from China. That will keep us right on track to travel the last week of May to get her and Isaiah. Please also pray for our finances. We have received a few donations which we are ever so grateful, but we don't want to ask our friends for anymore. We know everyone has commitments and struggles like all of us. We are looking at a grant that we know 2 families personally received, but we don't think we will qualify for various reasons, but we are going to try and apply anyway. We do think we can save the majority of what we need by end of summer, but we want to travel in May not August. We are looking at refinancing our house which will give us a little bit too. However, our tax refund was only 20% what I thought it would be and then we owe state a pretty large sum of money too. I am asking that God would provide in only a miraculous way that is obviously Him.

Another Birthday!

We have a 10 year old in the house, what a wonderful age!!

 Moriah Ann, born on February 7, in the middle of the day. I am so blessed to be the mother to this amazing daughter God gave me.  Moriah Ann is a precious, gentle and compassionate girl. She can also be very tough at times, wrestling her brothers and falling down with barely whimpering.

Moriah LOVES animals and little ones. She is often the chosen playmate for littles. She is patient with them, lets them choose what they want to play, and  always has a giggle or hug to share with them.
She is often called, "Mo-Mo". When she was born, 2 year old Jacob had trouble saying her name, so he began calling her "Mo" and we also started "Mo-Mo" then too. Both nick names have stuck, even friends call her that at times. I like to call her my "Mo-me Ann" as well, just for fun.

Moriah tends to be quiet and reserved, but she can still be a lot of fun. Because she is more quiet than the rest of the  children, when she has something to say it is important to really take the time to listen. She loves to play outside with either bike and scooter riding, soccer or shooting baskets. Some might  consider her a little more tomboyish than some girls, but not totally. I signed her up for worship dance and ballet this last year, and I think she is secretly really enjoying it.

She wanted to grow her beautiful blond hair longer and she hates it when I trim it. However, she hates the tangles too! But it is past the middle of her back now. She has always had an easy time at growing her hair longer. I think it will really thicken up as she grows up more.


On our girls' 10th birthdays we have a tradition of buying a doll house kit they could make with Daddy. Because Moriah wasn't a big doll girl, even though she likes them it just wasn't her chosen play thing, I wasn't sure if she would like a doll house. So I had to ask her what she thought. She wasn't so sure at first and just told me her typical answer of, "I don't know". I told her she needed to choose as I didn't want to buy it for her if she would rather not have it, but I didn't want to not buy it if she thought some day she wished she had gotten one. It was easy with Makenna and Eliza as they always loved dolls and I can tell Lenea will want one too as she begs to play with her older sister's doll houses all the time. For Moriah, she needed to take some time to think about her answer. She said to me, "Well, I don't want to choose the wrong answer I might regret." After a week or so I asked her again and she did indeed decide she wanted one. Instead of buying her a fancier one like Makenna and Eliza got, I bought her a cute little "Beachside Bungalow", they call it. Daddy is going to start helping her build it this weekend.

For her dinner she asked for Fiesta Stack (which is a favorite family recipe like a flat, baked, layered burrito) and Peanut Butter Pie for dessert, YUMMY!! Moriah can't want for Isaiah and Elliana to come home. She was the first older sibling that Asher allowed to play with her, likely for the reasons I said above and she gave him his space, waiting for him to take the lead in the relationship. I know she will be even more practiced now with the two new toddlers coming home. I can't wait to see the relationships grow.

Happy Birthday Sweet Mo-me Ann, I am so thankful to be your Mommy. I love you the mostest sweet girl. Yes, I love YOU the mostest, I loved you first.

Makenna's 18th Birthday!!

My second oldest had her 18th birthday this last weekend February 3rd. Wow, time has gone by too quickly. I am so thankful the Lord has given me such a sweet, loving, daughter whom I am proud to call me "friend" as well. She has matured so much the last couple of years. I can trust her to manage our group of children for me and she usually still has a smile to share with me when she has been at school all day, up half the night doing homework and wakes up before the sun for prayer at school. She LOVES her school and she is on her last semester, to graduate this May. It should work out to the perfect timing, if the Lord allows it, for her to be ready to manage our home with the children we are leaving, while we head to China to bring home our 2 newest littles. We are still praying for help for her, especially someone to stay at night with them. We might have a solution but won't know just yet.

Makenna has been a little spit-fire of a personality. I don't mean that in a mean way. I mean, that while yes, she too has a stubbornness (seems most of my kids do), but even so she wants to stand up to injustice. She wants to make sure everything is just so, and she will work hard and diligently until it is, and fight if she has to make that happen on her own.

Well, the last couple years, especially this last year, she is learning to die to that flesh she has been born with. She is learning to allow Jesus to be in charge. While He requires her to work hard and fight for injustice He wants her to do it in His strength, not hers. It is a lesson, that I myself am still learning, so I am glad she is working on it as a young adult. It will save her a lot of heartache as she goes on in her life.

I am so thankful, that in spite of my inadequate parenting job over her short time in my life, that the Lord is doing great things in her heart. He is causing her to seek after Him with all she knows how to do. He is provoking her to change some ways she thinks and to worship Him freely with all that she is. God amazes me and He is so gracious to us parents. We fail, we are ignorant, we are sometimes just plain blind to what our children need from us. But, God knows exactly what they need. He will keep working and He will keep His promises.

"Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."  Proverbs 22:6

She wants to do mission work some how, some day, some where. I have to be able to come to a place in my mind and heart that I without a doubt trust God and His wisdom and surrender her to him. Just like I did Tyler, my first child when I was a new mother. But letting adult children "go" actually seems to me even more difficult sometimes. But in reality, it should be easier. They still have God and if our heart was good with following the Lord's ways, no not perfection, but seeking Him and repenting when we failed as we raised them, then He will keep His word to us like in Proverbs 22:6. Our children, while even still maturing, have a foundation. They will only get stronger as they learn to surrender to Him.

My blessing to you for your birthday my daughter is that you would continue to seek the Lord with all your strength. And when you feel that difficulty of wanting to go your "own way" in your "own strength" that He would remind you that you can do nothing without Him. You are a mighty woman after God's own heart and I see great things being done through you for God's kingdom. I will cheer you on as you follow His lead. I love you my dear daughter. 

We gave Makenna a surprise party when her Daddy took her out to dinner. About 25 of her friends came to celebrate with her. I think she was very surprised! 

Adoption Little Updates

Here are a few updates for our adoption journey:

We finally received LID (Log In Date) after our dossier was sent to China on December 21. It took 23 days!! ACK, others I know took less than a week. That wait was a bit hard. But we got logged in on Eliza's birthday, January 14th. Our coordinator even emailed us late that evening, to tell us the news, as she knew how anxiously we were waiting to hear.

So now we wait for LOA (Letter of Acceptance) from China to say we may adopt both Elliana and Isaiah. The average wait these days is about 2 months. But it very well could take a little less and lot longer. I am trying to be patient. Today our coordinator received some paperwork from us that we sent a week ago, for our next step following LOA (I800, back to US immigration). Anyway, she sent an email to let me know she got it, but she titled it "LOA paperwork received".. My heart skipped a beat for a second thinking "We got LOA already in 8 days!" but then I quickly read the email and realized it was just the paperwork we sent her for after LOA. oh well wishful thinking. I guess you know what will be on my mind for the next couple months.

We still had not gotten Isaiah's update request, which was the 2nd one we had asked for since being matched with him 3 months ago. I asked the coordinator if there could be some miscommunication with it? She said she would ask the In-China Representative about it. Lily got back her to and said she will call the orphanage directly and ask our questions. How cool is that?
So about 1 week later we got our questions answered. Still no pictures, but here is the long awaited update: (all in red, black is my comments)

1. Weight and Height Measurements,    82cm and 11kg (that calculates to 32 inches and 24 lbs, which is quite the contrast from the last measurement we had of him, which could be feasible, but not the little man we expected nor the photos we have display.  China is often incorrect in measurements though, so we will see. But I took back some smaller clothes that I had bought him.)
 
2. What does he like to eat and drink?    He likes to eat meat, soft bread or bun, he likes to drink juice and milk. 

3. What calms him when he is upset?    If you pick up him and hold him, he will be fine soon. 

4. Is he walking yet?     Yes, he can walk quite well. But he prefers to be held all the time. (We have been told by a lady that has seen him through Fuling Kids International that back in June he was quite the ham and active little boy. I think we are going to have fun chasing him and Asher around. Elliana is going to have to learn to catch up with her brothers!)
 
5. How is his health since his last surgery, specifically his heart and lungs?     Usually he is doing pretty well. When it gets very cold, he is easy to be sick. And it takes longer time for him to be cured.

6. What activities does he like to do during his day?      He likes to play toys and watch TV, of course, his favorite time is snack time. (Liking snack could explain why he has grown so much! We believe he is getting very good care with his specialty trained Nannies)
 
7. Does he still drink from a bottle?         Yes, although he eats table food, he still takes bottle. (yes, again I have said on here before, we want this and really believe this helps with bonding and attachment)
 
8. Is he potty trained.       Not 100% done. He knows when he needs to go to bathroom. So he goes to ask his nanny to help him.

As far as Elliana I found another adoptive mother who is adopting her daughter from Ellie's orphanage just this last week. She offered to take any small gifts for some of us waiting back in the states and she was going to see if she could take photos of the children and pray over them. I found out yesterday that she indeed get to deliver our gifts to Elliana and she has a photo of her nanny holding her with the photo book we sent as well. Ellie looks so sweet even in her nanny's arms. It makes the wait harder on one aspect but easier on another. So much wanting to be with her and love on and seeing that she is growing up without us is hard. However, at least we get to see her little face and that she is being taken care of, even if in a cold orphanage with no Mommy and Daddy.

God knows the day we will go to China. He knows our needs financially, emotionally and physically to take care of 2 more blessings. He knows the needs of all our children at home. I am realizing that Asher just might need some more time not sharing us so much, as he surely will when the 2 littles come home. I am enjoying those days with a little less busyness and chaos, and a little more sleep.
 

Birthday Beauty

My sweet Eliza, turned 15 on January 14th! I can hardly believe how much she has blossomed and matured this last year. It is so sweet to be a mother watching your children grow up into amazing people. in spite of your weaknesses. Even more when they grow up glorifying Jesus. Eliza has had some heart to hearts with her Lord this last year. He has been so patient and faithful to speak to her, showing her His goodness. 

I love you Eliza Rachelle, Liza Lu. You are my precious daughter, one of my dearest friends and my sister in Christ. Thank you for trusting me with your heart. You are so beautiful, from the inside all the way to the outside. God has given you an amazing smile, gorgeous blue eyes, thick glorious wavy hair (that I would love to have!), and more importantly a heart for the vulnerable and a passion for what is right. I look so forward to seeing what He does in your life in the next 15 years. I love you always, forever and mostest.

Happy Birthday Dear Daughter (sorry this is a few days later)

Surgery Up-date

I am sorry I didn't get this updated sooner. We had a few rough days, but not horrible for him. Then we had a birthday celebration and just life right after his surgery. So days have been very busy.

Asher's surgery went amazingly well. Prayers were answered big time. He is being healed, from the inside-out. I have been praying for complete emotional and physical healing almost  every day we have known him, even before adoption. God is so good!

When we arrived at the surgery center he was great. The nurses started pushing some typical things like weighing him (which he typically fights), putting on "their" Pajamas (which wasn't going to happen) and taking vitals etc. I had to speak up a little forcefully at first as they were just moving and a bit rushing him and that was not making the atmosphere feel nice, but they did end up backing off and became very cooperative and even kind about it, once they understood where he was coming from. They gave him the Versed before surgery, which last time made him a little aggitated. I was a bit worried as last time Daddy was there, and this time it was my daughter, Makenna and myself. But he ended up being fine with it and just wanted to sleep. He was even asking to lie down on the hospital bed that he didn't want to touch at first, because he knew he was so tired and wanted to sleep. The surgeon was about 20 minutes late (Asher was his first surgery that day), but he still came in and asked how we were doing and prayed over Asher. I can't say enough about what a kind and wonderful man for a surgeon we have. He also happens to be an amazing plastic surgeon.

They allowed me to walk him back to surgery and even hold him when they put him under. Then I was quickly ushered out. The surgeon had warned me that even though he expected to take about 2 1/2 hours that if it was longer it was only because he was a perfectionist and wanted to take his time. Well, the surgery lasted about  3 3/4 hours. I was fine about it. Makenna and I read and chatted.

We spoke with the surgeon afterward and he said it went great. Something that China repaired wasn't done correctly and he fixed that. Then about 30 minutes later we got to be with Asher. He was quite sleepy for about an hour. But the nurse kept encouraging us to rouse him and wake him. This was quite different from the hospital stay from the previous surgery, as he slept solid for 2 hours there and they didn't really encourage us to wake him as long as he was doing well, which he was. Surgery centers seem more like they want you to move to recovery so they can send you home.

He woke and ate 2 Popsicles, then began crying his tummy hurt. The nurse gave him some anti-nausea medicine. As we were getting ready to go home, he asked for water, drank a lot and then promptly threw up just as we were getting him dressed in his clothes, all over me. (He also threw up in the car on the way home, but we were prepared and it didn't make too much of a mess thankfully.) 

The nice thing about after this surgery was that he was very calm and not agitated like he was following his last surgery. He was not stressed about where he was or the nurse even touching him and taking his vitals like he was before. The whole experience was night and day different to him. So I am so thankful for that and know it was your prayers and God's hand in it all.

He did end up sleeping again when we got home at about 3 until 5, which I did too. Then he went to bed at 9 and slept until 5 without a peep. He really needed that! We both did. He did have quite a bit of pain the first few days and tummy aches. We got anti nausea medicine this time which helped. We kept him on pain meds for about 3 days. His biggest challenge is that he didn't want to really eat at all. He says "Lip hurts". But every day is getting better and he complains less. He has only been on Tylenol since day 3 post operation.

He saw the surgeon yesterday which he said he looks great. He did say one part of his nose already "fell" but it is not obvious to me and I think the surgeon is just a perfectionist as I think he looks great. But I thought he looked handsome before surgery too.

He is a fighter and is doing so well overall. Just 2 days after surgery he was almost bouncing off the walls with energy, I had to slow him down. He kept doing little things to hit his mouth and nose and then would cry and sometimes a little blood would come out. I was afraid that that he was going to cause it to open up. We are past that part now and things are getting back to normal. The doctor said no more surgeries for a while. He will have a bone graft at about 9 or 10 and maybe another lip/nose revision after that. Then we will just have to see what is needed at later times as he grows.  

He will still be in speech for a long time. However, he is progressing so nicely! He is finally making some consonant sounds that he could not make even 2 months ago, like B and P and even sometimes T. We have to understand that he didn't have the opportunity to progress in making sounds like a baby and toddler do until he was a 28 months old. So he has to progress just like a baby would in making sounds and connections with his words. He has the ability to do it now, but he also has to unlearn some habits he picked up along the way prior to his surgery. It will come with lots of patience, growth and practice. 

He can be quite stubborn and not want to cooperate with speech practice some days, typical 2-3 year old boy. Both of his therapists are great and know how to get his  cooperation and they both do it so differently. He is about done with Early Intervention (he turns three in late February), but we are going to try and see if our insurance will still pay for our in-home therapist that he has been seeing. If not then we will likely drive up to the therapist on the Cleft Team. Unfortunately, she is 30 minutes away, so not our first choice, especially when Elliana and Isaiah come home this summer.

Again thanks for your prayers! We are so thankful that he is growing and thriving. We are so blessed.

To My Dearest Son,

Happy Birthday Tyler Jay! These are just a few words I have been wanting to tell you. Remember when I used to write all you kids a letter for your birthday? I regret that I have not kept that up, as I have so much to say and realizing now at this moment, so little time with you.I am still on a learning and growing curve mentally, emotionally and more important spiritually. So please just quiet your heart and always know that anything bad you see in me is not from God, it is not who I want to be. And if by chance, which I pray is more and more every day, you see anything good and noble in me, that is ONLY from our gracious and merciful Lord.

Here is a little story:

21 years ago, I was a 20 year old, very inexperienced, ignorant, new wife and brand new mother on this very day! I was scared I would make a mistake that would damage you for the rest of your life. I was scared someone else would try to hurt you and I could not stop it. I was afraid that I would burst with fear that I could not be your mother. I did not want you to have to grow up in this wicked, sinful world. I wanted to protect you from anything bad, the "Mother Bear" was born in me that day and my connection to you was pumping with every beat of my heart. My intense love for you was so strong that I could not imagine living without you. I was not walking closely with the Lord on that day, but my heart began to see a glimpse of His heart. I saw a miracle in your birth, in my own life being spared after a horrible birthing experience. I saw the miracle of a baby. I also began to realize, for almost the first time in my life I had to let go and had to give up the controls. I loved God, I believed in who He was, but I had not given up the controls just yet, I had not surrendered my life to Him. I had not given you to Him.

God was so patient with me. He had big plans for my life. I did not want any more pregnancies, labor and births to come from my body ever again. I remember saying to Daddy, "Is it okay if we have just one child? I was an only child and I turned out okay". 

I just didn't think I could emotionally and physically live through an experience like that again. I am so thankful, that God knew my heart and did not make me hold to my statement. I am thankful that although I did experience some painful and even more scary pregnancies and labor after that, He gave me 6 more children through my womb. And now he has opened our lives to adoption.

You were the light of my life. I quickly learned that as precious as you were in my heart, you were a sinner too. You were quite the ornery, stubborn, perfectionist, and active child. Being that I had virtually zero experience with children, especially little children, I educated myself as much as I could on how to parent you. I may regret not doing certain things, saying the perfect things, and for the many mistakes I did make, however please understand that many of the mistakes I made as your Mommy was because I loved you so much and just wanted to make your life better than mine. I wanted you to  not follow in my foot steps. I wanted you to follow Christ. Many of the mistakes I made were also just plainly because I was not obeying Jesus and doing what I should have done as a Mommy. I understand today that I should have only, simply just tried to show you Christ in Me, instead of trying to show you "The Perfect Mommy" the one who should control your world, even if to protect you. My intentions were good and Godly, but my method was totally off. I so appreciate your forgiveness and graciousness toward me.

I know that God has called you to Him, to live fully for Him, to surrender your life to Him. I know you are today learning what that means, even as a new husband. I am so thankful for that. I am so ever, thankful that He began a good work in you. I know you will stumble at times, like I do, but you will get back up with your God lifting you and at times carrying you. I know that you will make the right decisions in your life, because you have the Spirit guiding you.

I want you to know that I have surrendered you to Christ, I did several years ago. I am sorry I tried to hold on so tight those early years, that was a selfish thing for me to do. I  have learned that you are the Lord's first and foremost. He is the perfect parent and He has great plans for your life, to use you for His glory. You were just given as gift to me, to raise, nurture, love, educate, disciple and all the many things a mother should do. I pray that you were given those things, not because of me, but because of Christ through me. But you weren't given to me as gift for my own gain and satisfaction (even though satisfaction is something we do receive as parents), but for God's glory and kingdom. Again I praise God for his patience to a young, ignorant mother. 

I want you to know that I am proud to be your mother. I will always love you and be here for you. I still love you with all my heart, the mostest, more than the stars, taller than any mountain, hotter than the sun, more prickly than a cactus and sweeter than honey. As long as I am living my baby you'll be.
Thank you for your patience with me as well. I praise my God for your life, and for what He is doing in it.

Love you forever,
Mom

 Here is me hugging you at 11 months old.

Here is you just a few months ago on your wedding day, hugging me. I love you!